A Beginner's Walk With Jesus (My first step)

Ok, I’m new to all of this. Blogging, trusting in Jesus. All of it. But, here it goes anyway..... Maybe you’ll want to learn to walk with me.

When did I discover that I wasn’t going to get into Heaven on my own good works? After almost dying. How tragic would that have been? Not my dying, exactly. But the fact that I hadn’t accepted Jesus as my savior and the only way into Heaven yet. I believed that Jesus existed. That he was God. But I also believed that if I was a good girl and did more good than bad, then I would get to Heaven on my own merits. I look back now and wonder how I ever missed the message... That I am a sinner who cannot make it to Heaven on my own. I needed to accept that Jesus, the perfect lamb, died on the cross for my sins, and by believing in that, I am worthy to go to Heaven and live with my Savior.

So, let me back up and take that walk with you. . .

There I was, recovering from a ruptured brain aneurysm that the doctors all agreed should have killed me. And I was wondering, why didn’t it? Why was I still alive? I felt with an absolute certainty that God had saved me for a reason, but I sure didn’t know what it could have been. I was confused, scared, and had so much anxiety that I needed anti-anxiety medication for a long time. My doctors kept insisting that I was a "miracle patient", having survived the ruptured aneurysm the way I did. So I started thinking more and more about God, and during that time I picked up the "Left Behind" books. It was like my eyes were opening for the first time. I finally understood what had eluded me my entire life. I am a sinner. We all are. But the Lord loves me anyway. You, too. And he wants a relationship with us. Here and in Heaven. But, being sinners, we aren’t worthy of Heaven. So there was the dilemma. God loves us and wants us in Heaven. We love him and want to go to Heaven. But we sin. Sinners weren’t worthy of Heaven. So the Lord sent his son to Earth to live among us and to die for us -- untouched by sin. Never having sinned. Not once. But he took on the sins of the world. Yours, mine, everyone’s. And he died with the weight of those sins on him. The perfect sacrifice. That anyone who believed in him and believed that he paid the price for our sins, would be welcome in Heaven. For God so loved the world. . . yes, I finally got it.

And here I am ready to start that walk with Jesus, my Savior. Thankful. Scared. Imperfect. But loved by a God who is merciful and patient.

And, somewhere in all of this learning, I realized my anxiety is gone. I no longer fear death. And, let me tell you right here.... no one -- no one ever feared death as much as I used to. Now, I know when I die, I am going to Heaven to live with Jesus and the Father. And I look forward to the day I can say "thank you". Thank you, Jesus, for dying for my sins. Thank you, Father, for loving me. Thank you for saving me. Thank you for rescuing me and pointing me in the right direction. Thank you for giving me the chance to tell my story, and to take this walk. Walk with me. Let’s learn together.